So we hopped in the car and drove an hour and a half to the middle of nowhere. I mean, literally, it was the middle of nowhere. We were surrounded by rice fields, and the closest ANYTHING was probably a twenty minute drive.
Oh, but on the drive there, we kept going through tunnels ('cause we had to drive through the mountains near Arashiyama) and I asked my host mom if there were any kids' stories associated with tunnels. She said no; were there any in America? I said that there's a story that if you hold your breath while going through a tunnel, your wish will be granted.
Next time we went through a tunnel...
Little host brother: [holds breath]
Host mom: It's impossible. Don't try it.
LHB: [still holding breath]
HM: Seriously, this is a long tunnel.
LHB: [still holding breath]
We finally made it out of the tunnel.
LHB: [wheeze, cough, hack] HA, I DID IT.
Me: Please don't die.
...and then he did it for every single tunnel we went through.
So finally we showed up at my host mom's brother's house. (And he was living with...my host mom's cousin's mom? I wasn't entirely clear on the relationship. TOO MANY PEOPLE TO KEEP TRACK OF.) And my host mom's brother's son (at least, I assume that's who he was; I know he was my host brother's cousin) and my host mom's mom and my host mom's cousin were also there. And we all ate lunch together (which was delicious), and I swear, I was expecting one of the older women to pull out a halbard and start threatening someone, 'cause I was getting serious Summer Wars vibes.* I mean, seriously. The family dynamics were frighteningly similar.
Also:
Host mom: [pointing to a katana hanging on the wall] That's a katana.
Me: WHOA.
HM: In the old days, it was used to cut up old-days people. [grin]
UM, THANK YOU FOR THAT INFORMATION?
Also, my host brother kept hovering around my shoulder, trying to see what I was doing. (Grammar homework, as it turned out, 'cause I could do homework and talk to people at the same time.)
Me: Yes?
Little host brother: [grin, grin, grin, peeks over my shoulder some more]
Me: Did you need something?
LHB: [grin, grin, grin]
Me: Can I play with you?
LHB: Sure. Okay, I guess. [grin, grin, grin!]
Ah, the joys of communication with small children.
In any case, I had a little bit of trouble understanding people at first, 'cause the accent was different than the one I'm used to (especially the cousin, 'cause he had a little bit of a lisp on top of a different accent), but everyone was really nice. Even when I was probably too polite.
Me: Would you allow me to help?
Host mom's cousin: Um, yes? Sure? [to host mom in an undertone (she probably thought I couldn't understand Kyoto dialect, but I can)] What was that? Where does she pick up these phrases? I've never had someone say that to me before.
Me: I'M SO SORRY.
It also turns out that the ban on bragging about your in group does not extend to students you are hosting. I'm running out of ways to deflect praise. I never thought I'd say that.
Oh, and then it turned out that my host brother's cousin does tea ceremony, and so he wanted to do tea ceremony for everyone there. So he did. It was fun. And I actually remembered the proper etiquette (unlike my host mom's brother, who kept being berated by his son for holding the bowl wrong).
Oh, and I kept being called "oneesan" (big sister). That was kind of awesome.
After lunch, the boys and my host mom's brother and mother and I went down to a pond to catch crawfish with...actually, I'm not entirely sure what we were using as bait. I think it might have been dried squid. In any case, it turns out that Japanese crawfish are smaller than American ones and about three times as angry at the world. We were keeping them in a bucket, and they were fighting each other. And also trying to attack people. So I discovered that once you pull the crawfish out of the water, you run like the dickens, usually screaming that you've caught one, and avoiding the crawfish, which is attempting to both hang onto its food and kill you. Then you try to get it to let go of the string and get in the bucket, while it's still trying to kill you, and all the crawfish in the bucket are trying to simultaneously kill the crawfish you're trying to drop into the bucket and kill you.
It was far too much fun. (And probably all the adults thought I was crazy for running around with an eight-year-old and a nine-year-old in the heat, but, really, it was pretty awesome.)
Oh, and then we saw a water snake! It was huuuuuuge and skinny. And I learned the names of a whole bunch of new bugs.
But then we had to go home, which was sad.
Something that still throws me is that 「あほやな」 (You're an idiot, aren't you?) is used almost as a term of endearment in Kyoto. (My host mom tells me it's the same in the rest of Kansai, but I have yet to see any proof.) I guess it's similar to the way some people use, "You're such a dork." I dunno. I'm still trying to wrap my head around あほ not being a bad word.**
In any case, I think I'm gonna sleep now, even though it's too hot for living. G'niiiiight!
*Summer Wars is an awesome movie about a very large family which is planning a get together at the grandmother's house in the countryside to celebrate her 90th birthday. Things do not quite go as planned. Also, there is koikoi.
(Whoa, big picture.)
SERIOUSLY, THE SCENERY WAS EXACTLY THE SAME. I kept expecting random blocks of ice/boats/giant computers to show up.
**There are essentially two words in Japanese for "idiot." One is ばか (baka) and the other is あほ (aho). In Tokyo, baka is a much milder word than aho. (The best comparison I can come up with is that one would be "dummy" and the other is "moron face idiot.") In Kyoto it's reversed. So I keep hearing aho everywhere and it throws me EVERY SINGLE TIME.
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